Ruth Yunker is an author, humorist, storyteller, and traveler, championing the power and glory of the older woman. Her latest book is BABY, I’M THE BOSS OF ME. You can listen and laugh, and hear what she has to say on her Youtube, Website and follow Ruth on Instagram @ruth.yunker
There are so many potholes in our aging process. So many ways we can suddenly think we are giving up. Losing face in the eyes of the (younger) world.
One pothole, to which I am referring, is when we suddenly realize what has been a long held dream no longer sets our hearts on re. And we think oh my God this is it. I am old.
I learned to ski when I was nine years old, in the Berkshire Mountains. I then went on to ski even more fearlessly in the Swiss Alps when I was twelve. After that I skied whenever the opportunity presented itself,
until one day I came back from a day of skiing, drank my hot chocolate…
And never went skiing again. I was twenty-seven.
Years passed, but always, in the back of my mind, I knew I would ski again. I adored skiing. I always thought of this love in the present tense too. I love skiing, and soon enough I will be on skis again. I never had any doubt that I would one day y down a mountainside on a pair of long wooden sticks again.
Until one day, heading straight for my middle sixties, I woke up and realized I was afraid to ski down a hill. That I no longer trusted myself to make it down in one piece. And worse yet, no longer wanted to even try.
I’d had this specific dream on my to-do list so long it was a part of the fiber of me that would be forever young. And now, in one fell swoop, it was gone, leaving a gaping hole behind.
This gaping hole loomed. A symbol of failure. It announced I was aging, not only in years, but in attitude, bravery, confidence, joie de vivre.
No way! Not me! I got a grip. I wasn’t going to take this lying down. I decided to make a list of all my long held dreams to see which ones I really still cared about. I decided to make a list to see what might need updating. To get in touch with my dreams now.
Because what I want now is the most important. It is not about giving up or getting old, to change dreams. If one is continuing to evolve, then change comes. Change IS the amazing new thing going on.
And as we get older, in spite of ourselves, we are gaining wisdom. We are knowing ourselves better.
So, giving up an out-of-date dream does not mean I have given up having dreams.
It means, I am replacing out of date dreams with those in alignment with who I am now.
Ice skating! This is what has replaced skiing on my dream list. I used to ice skate. So I’ll still be gliding. Just not down the side of a mountain!
Stop for a moment and look at the list of your dreams. Do they truly resonate with you anymore?
If not, replace the rusty dreams with new, gleaming ones, ones that will make your heart sing! It will be invigorating.
Acknowledging what it is you actually want now will be the boldest statement of who you are so far!
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